Radiation Ramblings

1/3 finished with the last 1/3 of my cancer treatment!! Woo Hooo!! Okay, yeah, so I need to find little markers along the way to make myself feel like this will end soon. But that's a pretty good one don't you think? I see this "odyssey" as 1/3 diagnosis and surgery, 1/3 chemo and 1/3 radiation. So now I'm through with 11 of my 33 radiations--the final one-third. In just over 3 weeks, I will be through this! (Have I mentioned there will be a party?)

This morning, I have to say, was kind of fun at the radiation center. Fun? Yeah, it was. They were a little backed up so there was some back-up in the waiting room. The usual crowd, minus Mrs. 8:45 (I suspect she got in and out early and they took a little break because um....I was...um...barely on time). So I took a seat in my hot blue hospital gown and very quickly was joined by Ms. 9:15 and then a woman I've seen several times before who is always in a blonde wig but doesn't seem to have a "normal" appointment time. (Oh, and for the record, I can't tell if the 9:15 appointment is the woman there this morning--who is usually in a newsboy cap only--no wigs for her-- and very friendly, or the guy who wears a type of hat I always associate with fishing; they both seem to always be there by the time I get done with my appointment). Anyway, we three women were in our lovely blue gowns when newsboy cap and I struck up a conversation about our matching attire, which led to why the women were all in gowns but the men weren't. After a little discussion we discovered we were all breast cancer patients. And that allowed us to quickly realize that the men were getting radiated a little bit lower and that the hospital gowns would create an entirely different issue for them. And um, for us. We're kind of grateful they aren't in gowns.

Next, newsboy cap, blondie and I (I was a redhead today) discussed hair choices and eventually newsboy cap asked me how I tied the scarves the way I did (i.e. like a pirate, or a gypsy, or a biker...depending on your viewpoint). I spent a few minutes trying to explain it--with quite exaggerated hand movements combined with bad directions as I am wont to do, and she kept laughing and saying "stop! wait! I have chemo brain!" We actually were laughing quite a bit. Unfortunately, they came out to get me for my radiating time before I could be sure she understood and a scarf-tieing fashion show does not slow down the radiation machine. But I told her I'd bring a scarf next time and we'd go over it again. Frankly, I'm thinking she has the right idea--scarves and hats sure, but I am tiring of the wigs. Especially as my little tiny hairs start to poke out on my head. It's getting a little itchy!

After radiation (where the therapists once again commented on my shoes--they don't think they've seen the same pair twice. I'm not sure I can keep that up....but darn it, now I'm likely to try!!), much to my surprise, it was time to see the doctor. That normally happens on Thursday. But my doctor is on vacation so there is another doctor covering for her and he's in on Wednesday. Turns out he was also a really nice guy. And he gave props to my surgeon. Yep, he was super impressed with the scar from my surgery. Once again, kudos to Dr. Karam!! This is pretty much the only time a woman can take her top off (speaking of pairs) and be happy when the first response from the man in the room is "Wow, nice scar!!" He said he'd seen a lot of surgery scars and they can be a mess, but mine was nice, clean, straight and looked like it would fade away nicely. Oh, and so far my skin is tolerating the radiation nicely. He wasn't even too bothered by my excess suntan. He just said "We like to do the suntanning around here, so try not to beat us to it." So noted. And I gave the sunburn an extra dose of aloe vera. The doctor and I chatted for so long eventually the nurse came to break it up. It makes such a difference when the doctor actually cares.

Sure, I'd rather not be there, but if I have to be in a medical appointment every morning, it's good to have such nice, funny and interesting people there with me.

Tattoo Tuesday

I'm going to start with a pretty picture. That's ANDY and VALERIE ZUCKER, who hosted us for a very nice dinner Monday night as we closed out our long La Jolla weekend. Things to note in the photo: high chair, big glass of wine, baby monitor, big glass of wine. Now that's parenting done properly. (And yes, Andy wanted to have me over because I have less hair than he does). Valerie is also wearing the top she bought at the "Shop to Stop Breast Cancer" event. She just didn't, you know, buy it in time to stop mine.

So now on to the less pretty pictures. Today was the CT scan at the radiation oncologists and much to my surprise it was also tattoo day. Yep. I'm tattooed. I thought they'd be tattooing me with the "radiation alignment" points next Tuesday, but I was wrong.

It was an interesting appointment. I was at least able to figure out the parking (last time I parked in the parking lot and then had to walk all the way around the building and the ambulances to get to the entrance; the trick is to park on the street). I started the little routine I'll be doing each morning--check in with receptionist, head to the changing room, strip from the waist up, put on ever-so sexy hospital gown (open to the back), put belongings in the locker and take the key, wait in the little waiting room with other similarly attired people...and their spouses (and yeah, that's just weird; when I'm in my hospital gown I want other hospital gown people and medical personnel only please). I had a little time to get caught up on People magazine (8 babies? seriously? She had 8 babies?) and then the radiation tech came out and got me for my CT scan. I've never had one before.

Not surprisingly this involves me laying down on a table, exposing my already over-exposed breasts and then reaching up over my head to hold on to a bar while the doctor draws on me. Yeah, draws. With a marker. That's what you see in the photo (and yeah, the marker came off on my bra afterward; nice). Then the doctor leaves, the technician draws a little more and then--the tattoos! She said it would be like a bee sting. The middle one? That's quite a bee. For those of you with real tattoos that you actually chose to do, all I can say is wow. Really? Wow. And why??? The needle for these tattoos apparently goes deeper than with a "normal" tattoo (I didn't ask why; I assume it's to make it darker?). We'll see when I wash off all the marker, but I don't think these look like freckles. And did I mention I bled? From all three "tattoos"? I've been stung by a bee. It did not make me bleed. So, what you are looking at in the photo is all the accrued external damage from the treatment for cancer (after all, the cancer is, we hope, gone...so you aren't looking at that.) Top scar is from the sentinel lymph node surgery; the one just outside the bathing suit top is from the actual lumpectomy (and no, it won't show normally when I wear a swimsuit; I adjusted for the picture; and remember these scars are "only" four months old, so they'll look better eventually), one of the blue markers is also shown (it should go away soon) and then below in the cross shape is the markers for the tattoo and the middle dot is the tattoo. Here's a closer view on the left. I happen to have a mole right below where they did the tattoo so it's confusing, I know but there you have it. That's the tattoo on my right side, then there is one in the middle just below the breast bone, and of course one on the left. That's my alignment.

The CT scan itself wasn't much. They move you back and forth under the scanner tube and there's something spinning around me (scanning, presumably) that made me feel, oddly, that I was in a washing machine without water, or movement...so yeah, I don't know why that's what I thought. Not a big deal really. My appointment was at 10 and I was back in my office by 10:40. With just a few little bandaids over my new tattoos for my trouble

I get a blood test Thursday and my appointments are now set for the actual radiation. 9a.m every morning starting the Tuesday after Memorial day. So there we have it. I am officially no longer chemo girl. I am now Radiation Girl.

OH! And my assistant Michelle did the eyelash research for me. Apparently it's common that they fall out after the 4th or 5th round of chemo! Wow. Wish I had known that before. And it takes two months for them to grow back after chemo stops (so for me, that's two months from now). I'm pretty sure my eyebrows are giving up a few as well. Mid July really will be the end of all this. I should be done radiating, have some eyelashes and have about maybe an inch of hair. Super excited about all that. Aren't you?