Growin' It Out for Cancer: Month 3

Helloooooooooooooooooooooo Everybody!

Chris here for another installment of Growing It Out For Cancer.

Well, as you can tell from the title, it's month 3 of G.I.O.F.C (which just sounds dirty if you say it all as one word, so we'll skip over that from now on) and we've had some substantial growth from the last installment. Judging by the photo, I'm now over the 2 1/2-inch mark and bearing down on three inches of hair, which means I've put on about an inch since last month. I told you my hair grows fast. The bulk up top is starting to round itself out nicely and I'm getting both a nice wave on top across my part and some good bang overhang on the front. Let's take a look at some pictures of the hair from the front and the profile:













Two things: 1.) yes, that is a ray from heaven beaming down onto the top of my head. Happens all the time. I can't really help it, and 2.) there is absolutely no product in my hair whatsoever when these pictures were taken. On my mother's grave (sorry mom, if you're reading this). Anyway, from these more panoramic shots, you can really see how the bulk is starting to pile up on the top of my head (expect that only to get larger as the months crawl on) and how the front is starting to get a nice, droopy wave/pompadour style to it. The length is also starting to show in the back (it's easily resting on the edge of my shirt collar now) and, though it's hard to tell from these pictures, around the ear. The upper ear lobe is definitely being encroached and requires me to brush it back behind the ear every morning (fortunately, it stays there). It's not quite Peter Brady during the late-series episodes of the Brady Bunch, but it's getting there. Just wait until you see what it looks like in September and October. That's going to be something special.

What it is getting to, though, is the "Democrat hair" level that Teresa loves so much, and I have to say, while I'm not enamored with the front head shot (way too much bulk up top; I'm starting to look like Gumby, or when Max Headroom used to dress up like Reagan), I am kind of digging the profile, dog. The classic pompadour always looks good from the side, and I think the front and back are balancing out nicely. Not a mullet by any stretch of the imagination (lots of business in the front, but not much party in the rear yet), but really just a solid, classic pompadour. Richie Valens would be proud...

Hey, while I have you here, why don't you take a brief break from Teresa's blog and go check out my new website ForgottenGrapes.com. It was updated this morning just for you and features a profile of a brand-new forgotten grape. For those of you who don't know, ForgottenGrapes.com is a new wine website where each week we take a fun, irreverent, pop-cultury look at a wine varietal that for some reason or another has become lesser-known or uncommon among casual and everyday wine drinkers. We tell you all you need to know about the grape; what it looks, smells, and tastes like; some fun facts about it; the best foods to pair with it (thanks to Chef Brein Clements from Restaurant Omakase); and some bottle recommendations with links to reputable wine shops where you can buy the wine and try it for yourself. Because there's no better way to get to know a Forgotten Grape than by giving it a whirl on your own. We basically do for Forgotten Grapes what "Dancing with the Stars" does for forgotten celebrities.

So this week's grape is a tasty little blonde Austrian number (not Australian. Big difference) that really should be "in" instead of being so "auf." This troubles us, but we're here to make it work, people, and let you know all about it. So head on over to ForgottenGrapes.com right now and check it out right now. Go on. Teresa won't mind. In fact, she wants you to go...

(In case you didn't get the "Project Runway" references, our featured Forgotten Grape this week is the Heidi Klum of wine. And if that doesn't intrigue you enough to click over to ForgottenGrapes.com, then maybe this picture will.)




Don't forget: ForgottenGrapes.com is brand new and updated every Thursday, whether we're sober or not. Bookmark the site and make it part of your regular, every-Thursday routine, just like you do with The Dog Lived. It's part of this balanced blog breakfast.

Speaking of Teresa, we're headed in for her penultimate chemotherapy session tomorrow morning (session 3 of 4) and she'll be back tomorrow night with all the joy, pain, ecstacy, misery, boredom, awful chairmates, and suicidal stuffed animals you've come to expect from a regular Teresa chemo post. So definitely stop by tomorrow morning for that. You won't want to miss it, especially since we're supposed to see Dr. Bosserman the actual oncologist tomorrow for the first time since our initial consultation. Whether we actually see her or don't, you're not going to want to miss what Teresa has to say about it.

So that's all for me for now. Take care everyone, and I'll see you next month for another Growin' It Out For Cancer update, and hopefully every Thursday on ForgottenGrapes.com. Vaya con Dios!

Growin' It Out for Cancer

Hi Everybody, Chris here. Teresa was kind enough to turn over her blog to me tonight for this very special post. Basically she's tired and I'm giving her the night off. Hey, as exciting as our lives are and cancer is, you can't expect top-notch, hilarious, memorable material every night. That's why you're stuck with me instead...(rimshot)

So as you probably know (since you're reading this blog, and if you're not a registered follower, WHY AREN'T YOU A REGISTERED FOLLOWER YET???), Teresa has cancer. I know, big-time shocker! But her surgery was successful and now she's on to chemotherapy. Huzzah! Where as the oncologist said, she's GUARANTEED to lose her hair. GUARANTEED. (His emphasis, not mine).

Expecting this even before the surgery (apparently some of her pessimism is rubbing off on me), I did what any good boyfriend would do--I offered to shave off my hair in solidarity with her during her chemotherapy. I mean, if you're going to have one bald person in the family, why not two, right? Three, though, wasn't going to be an option. Seamus is far too reluctant to go the shaving route with us. He gets freaked out at the site of a Mach 3. Plus, apparently certain dogs actually need their coats to live. Who knew?

And as it turns out, though, Teresa was just as reluctant as Seamus to go through with my whole head-shaving scheme. She's always loved my thick, full head of hair ("Democrat hair," she calls it, as you probably already know from last night's post) and the last thing she wanted was for me to get rid of it when she lost hers. Christ, she nearly breaks down in tears whenever I get a regular haircut, and I usually end up keeping most of it then. Why have two bald people in the family when you only need one, she said? And who am I to argue? I mean, she has CANCER, for crying out loud! (and don't think she ever lets you forget it.)

Ergo the head-shaving/solidarity thing was right out.

So, we decided to go another way with it instead: instead of shaving my head in solidarity, I would grow out my hair during her chemo and radiation sessions. Less hair for her, more hair for me. She's Curly, I'm Larry and Moe. I get to look like Clinton, she gets to look like Jimmy Carville (and that's Hillary Clinton, for those scoring at home...that woman has quite a head of hair!)

Long story short, I had what may be my final haircut of 2009 (gulp! or at least until August gulp!) Saturday and decided that, much as Teresa is sharing her cancer-related experiences with you on this blog, I'll be sharing my hair growth with you as well. Remember, I'm doing this for cancer, so no, it's not just an excuse to get pretty pictures of me up on the internet. No matter what anyone tells you.

Once a month, we'll take pictures of me (and I'm sure you'll agree that I do photograph spectacularly) or more likely my hair and post them on the blog so you can see the progress my hair is making during Teresa's treatment. And don't worry, I'll save you the trouble of making the joke now: yes, this is going to be as much fun as watching hair grow.



As you can see from the baseline "before" photos at the top and the measurement photo just above, I had my stylist (okay, the woman at Supercuts) cut it fairly short to begin with, about 1 inch long on top at its longest point. And yes, those are gray hairs. Please don't flood our mailbox with bottles of Grecian Formula and Just For Men; I enjoy the salt-and-pepper look. It makes me look wizened and feel smarter than I actually am (like when hot chicks wear glasses, or anyone adopts a British accent).

So yes, get ready once a month to have new photos of my hair posted on the blog. I know: super exciting, right? But here's the thing: 1.) my hair grows really, really fast. Like Usain Bolt speed-of-sound fast, 2.) I think the longest I've ever gone without cutting my hair is 3 months--all told, this is going to be at least 6 months' of growth, possibly 7 or 8 or even longer (if I keep it up post-treatment while Teresa is still, well, shiny. We'll see. That will be a game time and psoriasis-related decision). I've never grown my hair out that long. I have no idea what's going to happen, and 3.) unlike most normal people whose hair grows down as it gets longer, mine doesn't. It grows up. And big. Like pompadour big. Like Del Shannon in 1957 big. Like Roman Centurion helmet big. Like Kid from Kid n' Play big (okay, maybe not that big). My running joke has always been that as my hair grows, it develops into a White Irish Afro (or Wifro, as I've coined it). Apparently we're going to find out what a full-on, full-blown Wifro finally looks like. And you too will get to see this unnatural phenomenon develop before your very eyes. It'll be like paying two bits to see the bearded lady or the six-toed man. Except this is free. And there's much less of a chance that you'll get molested by a carny...

Anyway, that's what I'm doing to support Teresa in her fight against cancer. I'm lettin' it grow. I'm growin' it out for cancer. And I hope you all enjoy and appreciate all the agony, misery, and increased expenditures on haircare products that I'm going to endure over these next 6-9 months. I'm doing it all for your amusement...Actually, scratch that. It's primarily for Teresa's amusement. And Seamus'. Because Seamus loves a good laugh at Food Guy whenever he can get it.

Oops, there goes my word count. The last thing I want is to be labeled as "wordy". There's not enough room for two of us like that on this blog.

See you all in March, everybody. Longer, shaggier, and substantially more democratier than before.

And may God have Mercy on my hair, and yours as well.

Yours in Dep,

Chris